1. Watch husband snuggle with baby. Watch it some more. Watch it a little longer. Notice fat on arms and think how cute it is.
CHECK
2. Throw birthday party for now seven-year-old daughter. Rent giant princess jumper. Watch it rain all day on birthday. Watch 20 seven-year-olds stare out window at giant jumper. Open back door and let them jump in rain. Hope not to be shunned by other mothers when school starts in the fall.
CHECK.
3. Put house up for sale on Monday after the rained-out birthday party, making sure it is the worst housing market for sellers ever. Make sure to put it on market only after you have put family and self through two months of remodeling hell.
CHECK
4. Go on vacation with in-laws and take funny pictures of kids. Make sure to pick a weekend when it rains.
CHECK.
5. Let super-pregnant sister throw birthday party for her son and my two sons. Allow her to plan everything and host at her house. Volunteer to drive my family to her house for the party. Volunteer my mother to chop copious amounts of vegetables and onions for cook-out. Take pictures of cake-eating. Let sister's mother-in-law, the one and only Grandma D, hold one-year-old eating chocolate cake while wearing white pants.
CHECK
6. Attend t-ball game for four-year-old son. Attend coach-pitch game for seven-year-old daughter. Repeat multiple times throughout the summer. Acquire bleacher butt. Prepare for fame and fortune when they both hit the big time.
CHECK
7. Con husband into buying mini-van so I can mitigate against the possibility of other mothers shunning me when school resumes in the fall. Choose black mini-van. Get kids aviator glasses and FBI jackets.
CHECK
My to-do list is now done. I can resume blogging.
Love,
Momma T.
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